Wednesday, December 8, 2010

I Learn the Hard Way

In honor of having my home finally decorated for Christmas, I thought I'd share this repost from my old blog. I wrote this last year right after the holidays, and it's too funny not to share with my readers! Keep in mind that I lived in a condo within Portland city limits at the time.

The last day of Christmas came and went, and our dead Christmas tree needed to be disposed of.

"I'm going to burn it!" I said. Darin mildly protested, and I got my way. I put it on the patio and tentatively put a match to a middle branch. "I really shouldn't do this," I thought, but my hand didn't obey. As a result, the tree burst into flames. I panic.

In true Louise-luck-fashion, the doorbell rang when the fire reached its peak. Why, hello! Enter Karen and her husband, two clients of Darin's here to drop off their virus-ridden computer. So utterly embarrassing.

Fifteen minutes later, a fireman knocked at our back door. I ran past Darin so I could take the blame for the fire. After apologizing profusely, "Mr. Fireman" (which I so stupidly called him) kindly told me that backyard fires are illegal but he would not fine me. He even waved goodbye enthusiastically to the very interested Rowena before he and his two friends took their leave.

The best part? For your viewing pleasure, we got the burning on tape. You can hear poor Rowena's protests, my panicky I-shouldn't-have-done-thats, Darin's stern you-shouldn't-have-done-thats, Karen's hilarious reaction, and there's even a ball of fire headed towards the house combined with a bleeped-out curse word from Darin! Enjoy.

video

Disclaimer from Darin: He wanted to delete the sound from the video because of his harsh demeanor, but rest-assured that he was very supportive after the firemen left, comforting me each time I frantically ran to the window in fear of more authorities (which was every ten minutes or so).

15 comments:

  1. hahaha- this gets me every time (glad you guys were okay)

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  2. Hahah, and here I was thinking I'd just let the boy scouts haul away my tree for $5. Backyard burning is so much more fun.

    Chic on the Cheap

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  3. I can't stop laughing. (I would NOT be laughing if someone had gotten hurt FTR. I am not completely heartless.) This is hilarious. Thank you for sharing this moment again!!

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  4. Louise, too bad we're both married, cause I think I love you.

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  5. haahhahahhahhahahahaa this made my day. "It's crazy out there, I shouldn't of done it." hahahahahahaaaaaaahahahahahahahaa

    Oh man this is the best. I've watched it three times.

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  6. Oh, and I don't think that Darin sounds harsh, I think he sounds concerned...and mostly just resigned. I love the trailing off comment...

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  7. hahaah that's hilarious. at least no one got hurt or anything. i would've been freaking out even more than you if that happened to me. xD

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  8. bwahahahahahaha! omg louise, that is hilarious!!! glad no one got hurt. and hey - its a good story! :)

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  9. Oh man, I am almost in tears from laughing.

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  10. That is the cutest! It just made me giggle. It sounded like you really were sorry but you also were secretly delighted. Isn't it amazing how fast they go up in flame?

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  11. That's hilarious and totally something I would do!

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  12. This gave me a good laugh! We usually burn our trees afterward in our outdoor fireplace. The fact that you did this at a condo is hilarious. I'm glad you weren't fined and that everything turned out okay :)

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  13. You can have the day off when we remove decorations this year! Dont't get too excited, it will be on a Saturday!

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Rants and raves welcome! Please alert me to any typos. (Seriously.) Thanks for commenting!

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